mercyrobot: (Default)
mercyrobot ([personal profile] mercyrobot) wrote2009-03-31 10:48 am

Jeeves/Wooster: Dictionary Fraglets 1-2/20

This is what happens when I'm extremely stalled and uninspired on what the Epic Epic needs to be doing with this one bit I've changed. I hit the random word button on the online OED a bunch of times till I came up with 20 words. Anything with a first use after 1930 was skipped, as were proper names and technical terms, but otherwise I took whatever it threw at me.

They're too long to be drabbles and too fragmentary to be ficlets. Therefore they are fraglets.

It's probably apparent from reading them, but they're not in the least meant to be related.

Also, are there any fannish twitterers? 'Cause right now it just looks like I'm stalking Stephen Fry. (This is the bit where I breathe noisily through my retainer, snort while laughing, and say 'will you be my friend?') I'm @missmercyb as some jerkface took my preferred username and had the almighty gall not to post squat once he had.

Dictionary Fraglets 1-2/20: scandal, list
PG rated at the very very most.
Candyfloss warning for both, I think! Mind the dental work!


Scandal

"This is it, Jeeves. We're done for. Aunt Agatha knows."

I stiffened. "Knows?" I held my breath in hope of some misunderstanding.

"Knows." Ber-- no. Mr Wooster-- as he would be now, as he would have stayed if not for my weak folly, as he should have stayed-- sagged dejectedly against the edge of the kitchen table. "I've got three days to get myself engaged to a girl of her choosing and go through with it or she'll have me locked up. I don't like to think where." He turned red-shot and swollen eyes on me, his lower lip trembling. "I don't think even you can get us out of this one, old thing," he said with a sigh.

I longed to embrace him, to whisper words of comfort and assurance, but they were no longer mine to give. I knew what I must do. "Very good, sir," I said, and I will credit myself that I did not choke on the words, even as they visibly stung him. I moved past him and into my quarters, where I retrieved the suitcases from beneath the bed.

A clattering of footsteps followed me after a moment. "Jeeves! What are you doing?"

"Packing, sir," I said without turning to face him, for I could not bear to. "While Mrs Gregson has good reason to keep any gossip about you at bay, she has no such incentive with me once you are safely married. It would be best if I leave the country immediately."

"So that's it, then? You'll just be off to the four winds?"

"It is the most prudent course of action to avoid imprisonment, sir."

"Where will you go?" He sounded so small and sad that I did turn, to find that he looked it as well. He was a hunched figure in the doorway, arms wrapped round himself, the usual bright spark that I so loved about him departed for parts unknown.

"I believe France will serve the purpose well enough."

"I liked France," he said, looking into the distance as if he could see it. "Do you remember that little cottage on the side of the mountain, with the blackberry patch and the corking sunsets?"

"Most vividly," I answered. My voice caught.

"You can't be arrested if you go to France? Or locked up at all?"

"It would be unlikely."

"Then I can't be either, can I?" He crossed the space between us, wrenched away the shirt I'd been folding, and caught me round the waist. "We'd be safe there, what?" The hope in his smile was heartbreaking. I had hoped to spare myself the pain of testing him thus, testing the strength of what was between us for fear of finding it lacking on his end.

"You could not return to England in your aunt's lifetime, possibly ever, sir. It would mean leaving your family, your friends, your home--"

I was interrupted by a tight squeeze and a murmur into the side of my neck: "You silly ass, you're my home."


List

The misunderstanding understood and all the loose ends tied in neat little bows, self and Jeeves settled in at home to enjoy what should've been a triumphant b. and s. I say should have been because when I say all loose ends, I mean all l. e. save one.

"I can't help but wonder, Jeeves," I said after a thoughtful draught. "Not that I'm not tickled pink you never had the smallest intention of running off with Reynolds, but one does wonder. I mean to say, from where I'm sitting--  not this bit of chesterfield, but rather metaphorically-- he's got everything I haven't. The chiselled profile, the clever conversation, the cadre-- if that's the word I want-- of admiring intelligentsia. Why over all that you'd chooose a chap you yourself have called mentally negligible--"

I think he was about to argue, but I put up a hand to stop him. "I know you've explained about that, but it doesn't make it any less true. I can't tell Spinoza from Spindrift and I'm not much to look at besides. I'll hasten to repeat I'm not complaining, but it's a bit beyond me why you would set your formidable cap sat such a specimen as myself."

"Would you like a list?" Jeeves asked, and I have to say, he seemed vaguely amused.

"If the thing lends itself to one, I suppose I would."

"The simplest explanation is that my heart chose for me." Words like that from him have the habit of making Woosters-- or at least this one-- go a bit tingly and pink all over. "But as to why it did-- I could cite your kind and generous nature, your optimism, your humour." Here he paused to turn my pinked and tingling face upwards and apply a short-but-sweet press of l. to l.

"The way that kissing you feels as natural and necessary as breathing. Your singular ability to make me forget myself. And whatever faults you may find in a mirror, I believe you are a great deal indeed to look at, Bertram. One such as Reynolds may possess qualities that you lack, but you make up what I lack. To make a summation, you complete me."

"Oh," I said, moved rather beyond words with more syllables, "right ho."

With that, Jeeves pried the glass from my mitts and gave them and many other parts better things to do.

[identity profile] starlightkissu.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 04:49 pm (UTC)(link)
urhfwaikdjYES.

I really wish you could have heard the sound I made after reading these. It something like the above clumpage of letters, but less articulate.

it's just....I adore all this.

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 06:24 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee! I tend to count removing speech ability as a success. Thanks! ♥

[identity profile] mxdp.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 04:55 pm (UTC)(link)
"You silly ass, you're my home."

One such as Reynolds may possess qualities that you lack, but you make up what I lack.


Oh, THIS IS GREAT. And only two? That means 18 more! Woohoo! ♥
I love the scandal fic, as I have frequently asked for a fic in which they're discovered, but manage to slip away. And the second is just so very, very sweet...
ext_24392: (Dark Fae Girl)

[identity profile] random-nexus.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 05:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Those same lines gave me the warm fuzzies, too.
<3
Edited 2009-03-31 17:54 (UTC)

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 06:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Yay, thanks! Forthcoming ones may not be quite so tooth-rotting, but hopefully enjoyable.
ext_204191: (Default)

[identity profile] charie-caphine.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 05:13 pm (UTC)(link)
That is sweet.
(Does Bertie honestly think France could hinder aunt Agatha?)

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 06:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks!
(Shhh! Don't tell him!)

[identity profile] kelly-holden.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 08:35 pm (UTC)(link)
(perhaps not, but since IIRC homosexuality was legal there at the time, she'd have no legal repercussions to threaten as in England)

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 10:36 pm (UTC)(link)
That was my logic, anyhow. I figure Jeeves can handle her if there's no jail involved.
ext_24392: (Kermit spazz attack)

[identity profile] random-nexus.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 05:53 pm (UTC)(link)
SQUEEEEEEE!!
Luv luv luvv'em!!

Looking forward to more!
*brushes teeth to counter the fluffy sweetness*
I'm ready!

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 06:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you much! There will probably be more tomorrow, though I don't think I can top this level of sugar saturation. ;)

[identity profile] lady529.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 06:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Love. Much love. And sweeties.

The Lady 529

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 06:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you! And as if this post needed any more sugar!

[identity profile] lady529.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 07:00 pm (UTC)(link)
*puts whipped cream on post and tops it with cherry*

The Lady 529

[identity profile] pipariperho.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 07:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh sweet. I'm also rather beyond words with more syllables now. Lovely.

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 07:54 pm (UTC)(link)
Glad you liked, thanks!

[identity profile] notchka88.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 07:42 pm (UTC)(link)
These were really good. From your warning I was expecting something really fragmentary, but it flowed very nicely.
The first one was very sweet, especially "You silly ass, you're my home."

I'll add you to my twitter, but I really just complain about school and essays because I don't have a life.

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 10:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Thankies! I felt like they were fragmenty because they sort of come in at the end of what could presumably be a whole story rather than being self-contained short-short stories, but it's all open to interpretation. Glad you like them whatever they are.

I followed you back-- I'm not the most thrilling person on earth either so don't worry.

[identity profile] kelly-holden.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 08:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Awww. What they said ^.

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 10:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks! :D

[identity profile] niektete.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 09:34 pm (UTC)(link)
It's so sweet my teeth are about to rot, but I'll happily live off soup for the rest of my life if it means reading this adorableness on a daily basis ^^ So very in character! So very well written! :D

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 10:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks so much! Your teeth may be safe, as this level of syrup is pretty unprecedented for me. But it's just so hard to be unfluffy with those guys.

[identity profile] chaoticchaos13.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 11:28 pm (UTC)(link)
*melts in puddle of warm joy*

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

I LOVE FLUFF

Thank you!

My insides are just all gah and yum!

[identity profile] hazeltea.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 12:03 am (UTC)(link)
So adorable. Just what I needed today!

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:42 am (UTC)(link)
Glad to be of service!

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:42 am (UTC)(link)
Nono, thank you! Hee, I melted people.

[identity profile] sunquistadora.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 12:15 am (UTC)(link)
Sugary goodness! I especially love Scandal. <3 I can't wait to read the next 18!

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:43 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you! I'll probably crank out one or two more on the 'morrow.
blackletter: (Default)

[personal profile] blackletter 2009-04-01 12:28 am (UTC)(link)
These make my evening so much happier!

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:45 am (UTC)(link)
Glad to help. Thanks! :)

[identity profile] nox-candida.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:43 am (UTC)(link)
Awww, these were wonderfully sweet. I didn't think they were fragment-y at all (and I'm certainly looking forward to more). Adorable (especially Jeeves' list ;).

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:53 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks so much! There should be more tomorrow.

[identity profile] emeraldreeve.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 02:12 am (UTC)(link)
I love them!

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you!

[identity profile] storyfan.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 02:14 am (UTC)(link)
These are both wonderful. I especially liked the first one. Good show.

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks muchly! :D

[identity profile] closetofheroes.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 03:23 am (UTC)(link)
Ooh, lovely. I especially liked the first piece (but then I've always been a sucker for the angst-ridden stuff). Thank you for this!

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:11 pm (UTC)(link)
You're welcome! ;) Glad you like.

[identity profile] triedunture.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 03:34 am (UTC)(link)
Yes, I agree with the others. Please, more! These are just great snippets with excellent voices.

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:12 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, thank you! More coming very soon, actually.

[identity profile] applea.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 04:06 am (UTC)(link)
*goes into sugar coma*
SO WONDERFUL! =D

Must...nom...moooore...:X

I want a sequal of that first little bucket of AWWWWW. <3

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 01:12 pm (UTC)(link)
Eep, maybe after I get through the rest of the prompts. Glad you liked!

[identity profile] ironicbees.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 10:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Too sweet? Nonsense, I say! These were just right! :)

[identity profile] thirstyrobot.livejournal.com 2009-04-01 11:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Good to hear, thanks!

[identity profile] lady-carfax.livejournal.com 2010-01-16 01:57 am (UTC)(link)
Oh I am so stupid not to mem "scandal". Have spent hrs searching for it.

*is completely undone*